Easier said then Done

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Don't you just love those people that you encounter during your life that feel the need to give you unsolicited (and almost always stupid) advice? You know the ones I mean.. like the person behind you in line at the grocery store, who sees you have Dandruff shampoo (or PMS medication, or foot fungus cream.. ect) in your cart and leans over and starts this conversation...

" You know when I had dandruff I slathered my head with mayonaise and wrapped plastic wrap around my hair and then slept like that and it cured it right up.. and it was sooo much cheaper and faster then that there shampoo!"..

Now you are forced to turn around and try not to say what your thinking which is usually something like.. Ummm... WTF!?!?! Now I'll never be able to eat mayonaise again.. and/or EEWWWW do I know you? Seriously?!?! Why do I care about your personal hygine issues or even better.. why are you sooooo concerned about what I am buying?!? But NOOOO!!! You cant say that, so you smile graciously and say "Really?!?! Thanks for the info but I really prefer the scent of this shampoo!" Then attempt to ignore them and get out of there as fast as you can.

This blog is and isnt about those people.. its about a type of that person.. you know the ones WITHOUT kids who feel compelled to tell you what is wrong with your parenting style or better yet how THEY would handle that situation
UMMMM...yeah.. you dont have kids.. so I am sure your parenting experience is VASTLY superior to mine.. better yet.. you dont have MY kids..better known as the minions of hell... the screaming mimis..Barely controled chaos! Seriously.. my house sounds like wild kingdom.. someone is always yelling, screaming, irratating someone else.. its never ending, from the moment they wake up until they fall asleep, someone is always crying, screaming, jumping, fighting,... I could go on.. but you get the picture.

So today I take my daughter to the Dr. and she is soooo hyper and she is touching everything, fiddling with everything.. singing at the top of her lungs, jumping, runing.. fidgitting..
Sit down, stand up, run around the room.. sit down, press this button.. poke moms leg.. climb on moms lap.. poke mom again.. run around some more.. which in real time sounds something like this...
"Rhi stop that.. Rhi sit still, Rhiana...sing more quietly, Rhi stop poking me.. can you sit in your own chair and not on top of me please?.. no you cant run down the hall and see whats making that noise.. sit down.. dont pull the leaves off that plant... *Sigh* sadly we go on like this for a full 30 minutes in the waiting room..*double sigh* By that time I am just worn down.. tired and want to get the appointment over with because I know we have the car ride home and then the chattering, running, jumping, singing and screaming of the other children will join in once we arrive home *triple sigh*

25 minutes into our wait.. a woman (who had already cooed at how beautiful Rhiana was and how she wished she had found the time to have her own children and looks to be about 50) turns to me and says.. you really shouldn't tell her to stop so much..or to calm down and sit still so often.. she is a child.. they are so full of life and energy and if you keep telling her no or stop she will lose that zest that makes them young...Then she preceeds to inform me.. If I had had children I would never try and stifle thier love of living..

That, right there, was where she lost me.. or at least I lost it.. any desire let my rational mind make me smile and nod at her...nope wasnt gonna happen..All I could think was First off this is NOT your child.. you dont have any.. remember that fact , you old busbody?!?!? Second since you dont have any children I dont particularly care about your hypothetical parenting plan or skills.. trust me.. if you want to work on your parenting plan I can arrange for you to borrow my kids for a week.. Then we can talk about what you feel is an appropriate way to deal with children..But alas as much as I wanted to say that did I? noooo of course not because my mother.. with her wooden spoon, spank first, question later discipline tactics, taught me to respect my elders.. so what I end up saying is "Thank you, I appreciate your imput, but since you dont know me or my children I think I will stick to my own methods"
Thank you.. thats what I said.. why??.. why am I thanking a mindless busybody?? Who the hell knows.. maybe I need to dunk my head in Mayo
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  1. lzy724's Avatar
    While I can srsly understand where you are coming from, this really made me LOL...

    I dont have kids, never attempt to tell folks what to do with theirs.

    My mother always try to do stuff like that, not so much of the... "I would do this, or that" but the... cooing over babies and what not. Now, like I said, I dont have kids, so I dont know how those folks feel, but if I had somebody I didnt know, come over and stick their face in my babies I think I would have to pull out a bat. I usually grab my mother and run away. LOL.

    I guess some folks just cant mind their own business... or just trying to find a way in to start a conversation while boredom sets in standing in line? I prefer to mind my own.
  2. lostsouls's Avatar
    ehehe ,,, sounds so familar ... i have " only" two kids ..two boys ... my youngest is hyperactive , social disordered and def ... and .. highly intelligent ... dangerous mix ... and i stoped beeing polite when he was in the age of 4 or 5 .Cause .. it just go on my fucking nerves when peeps come with such stupid advices ...they dont know me and my kids ..i dont know them and may wil never cross them i go straight out forward and tell them to stick their nose into their own business ... hey it helps ..and the face they make, priceless ... . (btw i am straight ahead to own family members too ... i am just not made for that polite stuff)

    If they nerve me . i let them know that... clearly !
  3. taria's Avatar
    dont worry about other people, you know your kids better then anybody else around. you keep doing what you know best. your a good mom.
  4. 3-darena's Avatar
    I can totally relate to that! When my boys were young (about 6 & 8 ) we were in the grocery store. It was a Sunday so they had their little suits on and looked so cute. Well, I have/had a rule that they were to stay by me at the store, no wandering off. Anyhow, the boys wander off, I call them back, they wander off, I call them back. Finally the 3rd time I very sternly say "Boys!!" no yelling, no shrieking, no derogatory comments, just the 1 word, strongly so they knew I was serious. They trotted right back and stayed with me.

    However, I get to my car and I'm loading the groceries with the boys' help and this older woman from behind me in line comes up to me. "You know you have such an attractive family and you look so nice, but you shouldn't be so mean and hateful to your children it's awful the way you talk to them".

    I just kind of looked at her, stunned, trying to figure out what she is talking about. I said "excuse me?" so she says the way I was ordering them around was wrong and I should be ashamed. Well, before I could speak up my darling boy Bradley (he was about 8 ) looks her up & down and says, "we weren't listening to her & we aren't s'posed to wander off so that we don't get hurt. How else was she s'posed to call us? I'm not s'posed to talk to strangers but you're rude!"

    The woman's face was priceless. LOL.

    See I raised all of my kids to speak their minds, to respect their elders but to understand that it is a 2 way street and they are never required to give respect to those who don't respect them (we were very loved in the public school system *snicker*). I figure if I was a horrible mom, he wouldn't have defended me ;-)
    Updated 01-18-2011 at 05:52 PM by 3-darena

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