The Inner Thoughts of a Madman

My Horrible Tale

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Let me preface this with "Parts of this story are horrible, parts are rather non-PC" BUT... what the heck. I have a story to tell and I need to tell it.


I was on my way into the house from the office (Separate building on the property) and I noticed a skinny grey cat sitting by some of the flower pots, now normally I shoo neighborhood cats off the property because we have our own cat. So I started my shooing, and the cat just sat there... then I noticed that it was emaciated, drooling (and I don't mean I am hungry drool, I am talking sick, streams of drool) , having jerky spasms, and seriously disorientated. First thought through my mind... sick cat, right? Then dispite my shooing (I am a BIG Scary guy that has tangled with African Wild Cats in the past, a little kitty don't scare me) he comes right after me... not in a crazed attacking manner, but how cats follow people... now I know that is not right, so I calmly make it back to the house dodging any contact with the cat.

And it follows me to the door, which I get through, and it is now sitting outside of the door.... just sitting there looking at me. Ok... I take a little dry food and put it on a paper plate and sneak it out the door. This cat is THIN... But he ignores the food completely - he would not eat at all and just continues to look at me and drool. If the cat was starving, and that thin he had to be... ignoring the food is just not a good sign. The way the cat was looking at me and spasming slightly gave me the heebeejeebies, so I went down to the computer in the house and googled signs of rabies in cats...

and sure enough Stage 4 can look just like this...

Needless to say a certain 4 letter expletive was uttered.

What to do?

Call the Dog Control Officer...

No help, they only "Do Dogs" which in this county.... not sure it was a phrase I would turn... but oh well.


No help, no one to handle it, too many calls (It's a Friday Night in Schoharie County NY... LIKE WTF IS GOING ON THAT WE CAN'T GET HELP??? I am picturing a full on rumble at the Walmart over the last six pack, maybe some hooligans lighting flaming bags of poop... Impromtu demolition derby at the Trailer park... who knows...

So no help there...but they said they would try to get some help and would call back. Ok.. a maybe then.

In the mean time, the cat is now in the middle of the road... which would be ok if we didn't live ON THE BUSIEST MAIN ROAD IN THE WHOLE F'IN COUNTY.... Cars backed up, people honking, the whole nightmare roadshow... ok... can't let this go, I am who I am, so I pick up a broom and head outside thinking I am going to herd the cat off the side of the road, because even though it could be rabid, I am not about to watch it get hit by a car or worse yet cause an accident (Because the way the JACKASSES in this town drive... it could turn into a piler)...

Ok, So I get out there into the battle zone, and am shooing the cat with a broom to get it moving.

Here is where I need to explain something...

In my area we have people (Ok... here is the non-PC part) whose unique and outstanding features have made us label them as "Action Figures" - These are your folks who "Drive Lawnmowers into town because they can't have a license" - or walk around town shaking and talking to a pencil 2 inches infront of their face. Now before someone scolds me, yes I have compassion for these people, I realize that they are human beings too, but the evil in me makes me also realize that these behaviors are a little outside of society's norm and therefore as a member of this society I must do what I have to... so in county terms... they are Action Figures.

Ok, So when I use the term below, you will get the picture...

Back to the story...

So I am out there for a good half an hour standing on the side of a busy road with a white house broom trying to keep this cat from disaster, and also trying not to get bitten...

All this time... people are honking, waving, and pointing... at...... ME...

NOW I am Huge Guy 6 foot tall and I weight more then a linebacker and maybe a VW Bug put together... standing there in the heat on the side of the road... with a broom...

Yep... I to all of those people have now just become an Action Figure...

The one thing that I never wanted to be... and now I am one... if for only a day.

Well after awhile I get the cat out away from the road, no one from the Sheriffs has shown up, and when I go back in the house there is a message on the machine from the dispatcher that they couldn't find anyone to help, and to call any of the vets in the area... right... after 5 on a Friday... good luck.

So no help, the Cat has since wandered off, and I am left wondering what the hell we could have done to help it. Also makes me wonder why the hell I pay taxes... but that is for another time.

I really hope that the Cat wasn't rabid and that maybe his outcome will be a good one, but the realist in me says that that is a slim chance.

Life sucks.
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Musings , Cult of Personality , Deep Thoughts


  1. lzy724's Avatar
    awww, poor cat, my heart is sad now. Hopefully it will go quickly... I hate to see any animal suffer.
  2. ZigZag321's Avatar
    I just absolutely have to respond to this blog.

    First off, Traveler, (and I know you or anybody else doesn't need to hear me
    say this), but you have a huge heart -- and that is freaking awesome.

    Here's the thing too. I swear to God my property is like the beach. Everything
    and everybody which is or who is stray washes up there.

    So I have a bunch of cat, dog, and wacko human tales too. But I'm just gonna'
    say this. There you are being the good guy and people are looking at you like
    you're the lunatic. And even worse -- nobody is willing to help you! Rrrrrrrrr.

    I freakin' hate that.

    Some complete idiot somewhere either abandoned that cat or let their cat
    out un-neutered and now there are God only knows how many more homeless
    cats wandering around, starving and possibly diseased with Feline Leukemia
    because of some stinking stupid human -- who also probably has a house full
    of dirty kids they don't care for.

    And so why do I spend so much of my free time on the computer?


    I could go on. Oh believe me. But I'll shut up now except for this ...

    IMO? Leave some food and clean water out tonight.

    It is possible the heat and hunger had it. I hope so. Maybe it will get healthy.

    Good luck.
  3. Ladyelf's Avatar
    Eric, you wonder why you are my hero? You are so just like me, you don't have a choice you have to help, it's just part of who you are, no matter what the circumstances. I would have done the same thing.

    Better an Action Figure for a day, then a heartless, out for myself human for a lifetime.

    Zig, our house is the same, we back up to a wildlife preserve and I figure the way things have been going this summer, it wouldn't surprise me a bit if a coyote came knocking on our back door this winter asking for a bandage for a hurt foot.

    It could be Eric that the cat was just very, very hot and couldn't eat. He'll be fine....and if he's not, at least he knows someone tried to help.

  4. belladragon's Avatar
    It's good to know there are still people like you in the world Eric *hugs*

    ........................ says the woman with 6 cats & 3 dogs cause like zigzag my home is a magnet for strays - and like Ladyelf - surrounded by wild and have even had to 'rescue' a poor lil joey (baby kangaroo) & rehome a 'lost' galah (pink & grey cockatoo) who could talk - not to mention the other scaly, slimy & furry things we've rescued over the years.

    You are a good person & that's what counts - you took the time to try & being an action figure for a day can't be all that bad surely LOL
  5. Admin-Syyd's Avatar
    Eric, you're a gardener in the field of life, and those of us that have been fortunate enough to be part of your garden, reap the benefit of being tended to by such a loving hand.
  6. dpanzee's Avatar
    I agree with everyone that you do have a big heart and you care about a little cat where some people wouldn't bother. I would hate to see an animal suffer and will even re-locate a spider on my balcony outside, rather than killing it. It must be the weekend for saving critters because there was a tiny mouse in the hallway of our apartment that I'm assistant superintendent at and between me and the cleaning guy we managed to catch him and put him outside. Hopefully this little cat found some help elsewhere but thanks to you he didn't get run over. Big hugs to our kind hearted Eric. :o)

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